Have you ever had (or known someone who had) a chronic and distressing physical condition? For people in this situation, it can be really difficult to figure out who, of the many, many healing and medical practitioners out there, can actually help them. It can take years of trying people who don’t work, and then when they find the right one, ah! it’s an amazing experience of relief, of being seen, of being in the right place.
In different ways, we all understand this experience, in some area of our lives. I certainly do.
A few years ago, as a new healing practitioner who knew nothing about business, I was desperate to figure out how to grow my practice. For those of you who’ve never had this problem, you may not realize the baffling and diverse array of “business growth” programs and services that are out there. It’s really difficult to figure out where to start, what to trust, what programs will pay off the substantial financial investment required to participate, and who can actually help.
Eventually, I ran into some really creative business growth people. I ended up spending a LOT of money for a program that, in the end, despite its creativity, really wasn’t a good match for me and my way of growing in business. A good match for others; not so much for me. Sigh.
I’d gotten seriously “off track.” I’ve been there in other places in my life–the therapist I thought would help, spending years, and finally realizing I just wasn’t moving forward; the chiropractor that was in so many ways amazing, but my back still kept getting injured anyway.
You know what I mean. It can be so demoralizing to make the big commitments, only to find that it really wasn’t the fit you thought it was going to be. Again, sigh.
Nonetheless, I am very, very grateful for this detour in business, now that I can see it from a perspective several years later. Because eventually, I found business coaches who were more in alignment with my values, preferences, sense of myself, and my goals, and I probably never would have found that if I hadn’t gone so seriously off course.
“Off track” can be a huge gift. When we finally figure out that we are on the wrong path for us, then often what happens is huge clarity about what really is the right path for us. It’s the contrast that makes it clear.
What we really want is to feel in our bones what it’s like to be in full alignment with ourselves. We want to be fully congruent, knowing we can trust ourselves, our choices, and the world we’ve chosen for ourselves. There’s nothing like it.
All of us have a place in our lives where we feel this alignment. Sure, most of us have areas in our lives where we just can’t figure it out–relationships, or work, or in our emotional lives–but we all also have areas in which we just know who we are, and that we are fine and that we are on our own side.
Take a moment, and think about that part of your life. What part of your life would that be? A piece of your work life that you are really good at and you know you’re good at? Maybe a sport. Or a set of relationships you deeply trust. Or perhaps it’s art that you do. Where in your life do you trust yourself completely (or completely enough)?
Now, imagine that that is a physical space around you. Imagine it growing larger and larger, including more and more parts of your life, so that more and more, you trust yourself and you are in alignment with what most matters to you.
No one wants to go off track. But when it makes clear to us our deepest values, and inspires our re-commitment to what matters most, it’s almost worth whatever discomfort (and for me, money!) it involved.
What discomfort, what out-of-alignment experience, is currently teaching you about what matters most to you?
Love this, Leslie, especially ” that we are on our own side.” Lovely thoughts to meditate on in my daily writing to self reflections! I also love the image of that room of alignment getting bigger and bigger. I feel that gives me more and more space to play and to be myself.